about

October 31, 2015

This place was active from ’10 to ’13 as I, an angry young student back then, ranted about life and talked music/art. A few years later, things have changed — I’m less angry, less judgmental, and no longer a student. Instead, growing expectations, pressures and ‘adult-life’ have come to take their place, and so wages a new conflict between old dreams and growing up.

Here is where I sketch out my thoughts & memories about this phase of life and mix it up with fiction. All intertwined into each other and indiscernible, and you get to watch. Anything & Everything.


Sold

December 31, 2015

I was never quite the social guy. I never really knew why, though. I wanted to talk to you so many times. Walk up to you and just chat away, like an everyday triviality. Make you smile, make you laugh. Make myself smile.

Except I couldn’t. I stammered, and blanked, and paused, and thought, and ahed and ummed till you were gone.

You weren’t just one — there were many of you through my life. I failed every time, with each one.

Unless maybe it was through a man made device. There, you would think I’m fairly normal, sociable. But I even blew that as well.

Now, my time has come. That part, that phase of my life, it is lost and will forever haunt me. I am chained.

And He, I think — He ruined me. I didn’t even know uptil now when He ruined me again.

Goodbye. I never matched up anyway.


Some new shit

December 14, 2015

…after quite some time. Thank the lord for technology!


There is no ‘The One’: Part III

November 19, 2015

(contd)

I will be eaten up. One thing remains, however — Other ‘me’s will have lived out my other dreams and goals. In other universes, where I am a king, or a god, or a hero. Or a savage villain, a killer, a murderer. Or a beggar, or a poet or artist. Everything I want to be and see exists, only in another plane of the universe. A parallel world, unseen and untouchable.

The me, right now? It’s just one such world, with it’s problems and it’s limited paths.

As for the woman of my dreams? She, too, exists in every world as a different form.

She even exists in multiples, right here in this word. An innumerable quantity I could spend a good life with.

But at the end, you just have to pick one. It is not ‘the one’, it is one of many that you will never see or meet.

There is no ‘The One’.


November 18, 2015

5-hour sleeps and somehow the weightlifting’s still going on.

Well, at least something’s working out.